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As a Big Budget movie, I'm sure that "Volcano" took more than a few months
to make. Too bad someone associated with the movie didn't take that time
wander into the local library (the children's section, perhaps), and check
out a book on "Volcanoes". I've seen Saturday-morning cartoons that have
better understanding of lava.
Instead we get many scenes of outright stupidity that would challenge even
the densest of viewers. In one scene, Tommy Lee Jones and an assistant
standing near a volcanic vent, and their protective suits start to melt
course skin is stronger than a protective suit, so they escape unharmed).
But in numerous later scenes, people walk by lava like you might walk past
lake. Maybe this is because no one seems to know it's lava. I lost count
of how many times a character said something like "What is that stuff?" or
"There's something really hot and glowing coming down the street, and
are melting into it. Wonder what it could be?"
In what has to be one of the worst scenes ever filmed, two characters load
an injured man onto the outstretched ladder of a hook & ladder truck.
they hang onto a dangling fire hose as the ladder is lifted above the
The heat is so intense that the fire hose SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTS, but our
characters are unhurt (their boots smoke a little). I didn't know that
hoses were so flammable...
But "Volcano"is not just a dumb disaster flick with bad science. No!
also a Socially-Important Commentary on our Society Movie! Throughout the
film there are numerous "social messages". These are so corny and
that they could only have been written by people who have never actually
experienced them. A racist cop tries to arrest a guy for assault (in the
middle of a disaster scene!), but then the two team up to help save the
Aww. Later, a little kid notes that "everybody looks the same" when
covered by ash and soot. Aww. America's racial troubles could be ended,
only a giant volcano threatened us all.
More? Oh sure, there's more! Tommy Lee Jones is the too-hard-working dad
who comes to value his daughter. Said daughter is a selfish brat who
some responsibility, and respect for her dad. There's a guy whose only
in the movie is to say obviously insulting things. This makes him the
guy". One can see the writers of this movie hammering his role out: "We
need someone who's rich and yuppie-like and snooty. Someone like us, only
not as enlightened. Someone who wouldn't make a Socially-Important
Commentary on our Society Movie like we are!" Of course, bad things
to him and all is right with the world.
In the end, the mysterious, glowing, sometimes-hot substance we come to
as "lava" is channeled into the sea, and all of LA lives happily ever
in a just and fair world. A world, of course, with a big smoking volcano
plopped down into the middle of it. Certainly that won't affect the real
The lessons of this movie are quite clear. 1) lava is harmless if you
touch it; 2) small children will inevitably wander into incredible harm
emerge OK), and 3) only through the trauma of sudden volcanic activity
we come to appreciate the true Brotherhood of Man.
Whoever thought up this movie should be thrown into a volcano...
Tags for Volcano Full Movie
, Don Cheadle
, Gaby Hoffmann
, Tommy Lee Jones
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